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A lot of us ask the wrong question about how we live our faith.
Not always out loud, but quietly, in the back of our minds.
This post invites you to Build a better question, changing how we treat others and grow.
The Question That Gets Us Nowhere
A new waitress once walked into her first day on the job and, before she even knew where the menus were kept, asked her coworkers: “What can we get away with around here?” She didn’t last long.
It’s easy to laugh at that story. But if we’re honest, many of us ask the same question in our own lives. How far can I go? How close to the line can I get without getting into trouble? Some people call it walking the fence.
The problem with walking the fence is simple. Sooner or later, you fall. And when you do, you end up with splinters.
What Does the Bible Say About Christian Freedom?
The Apostle Paul addressed this exact issue in his letter to the church at Corinth. He writes:
“All things are lawful, but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful, but not all things build up. Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor.” – 1 Corinthians 10:23-24
Paul isn’t asking whether something is allowed. He’s asking whether it is helpful. Does it build?
There are plenty of areas in life where we can walk the line between sin and liberty. Something might be permissible, but that doesn’t make it the best thing for you or for the people around you.
The Better Question to Ask Yourself
Paul flips the script entirely. Instead of “What can I get away with?” he points us toward a completely different question: What builds up?
And not just what builds me up. What builds up my neighbor?
That one shift changes everything. When we focus on what builds others up instead of tearing them down, life becomes more satisfying. We stop always pointing out what’s wrong and start noticing what’s going right. We become builders, people who leave things better than they found them.
How Focusing on Others Changes You
Here’s something worth sitting with.
Focusing on what builds others up doesn’t just change the people around you.
It changes you.
It changes your attitude. It reshapes how you see the world and the people in it.
As Christians, we are in the middle of a process the Bible calls sanctification. It’s a big word with a simple meaning. God is setting us apart from our old life and shaping us into the image of Christ.
That process is not a straight line. Some days it’s two steps forward and one step back. Other days it feels like three steps back and one step forward.
God Is Patient With the Process
Here is the good news. God does not give up on the process. He is patient. He will stay with it until the day we stand in His presence.
Knowing that should free us. We don’t have to be perfect today. But we are called to be intentional. We set our minds on growth. We put old habits behind us and we build new ones.
The goal is not to see how close to the edge we can get. The goal is to become more like Christ, and that happens one choice at a time.
A Practical Way to Apply This Every Day
Before you speak, post, or act, pause and ask yourself one question:
Does this build up?
That question works in almost every situation. Before you send that text. Before you make that comment. Before you make a decision that affects someone else. Run it through that filter.
Then take it one step further. Look for one specific person this week whose good you can seek. Encourage a coworker. Help a neighbor. Send a message to someone who has been on your mind. Small acts of intentional kindness are how builders operate.
Life Application
This week, commit to replacing the question “What can I get away with?” with “What builds up?” Before you speak, post, or act, pause and run your words or actions through that filter.
Then go one step further.
Identify one specific person you can encourage or serve in a tangible way before the week is over.
Ask yourself:
- Am I making decisions based on what I can get away with, or based on what builds others up?
- Who in my life needs encouragement right now, and what is one practical thing I can do for them this week?
- In what areas of my life am I walking the fence instead of walking in the freedom and purpose God has for me?
Don’t walk the fence. Build something. God is patient with the process, and He is inviting you to be part of it.